Dory Maust
© 2007- 2010 Dory Maust, All Rights Reserved
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Bambi’s mother didn’t die.
Sorry to be the messenger but it's a cartoon. I am blogging this topic (not Bambi) because I
was asked to do this by an aspiring writer interested in non-fiction. I can be very cynical (I
know - shocker!) which is what predisposes me to fiction most of the time. No carnage for
the imagination. Opinions-a-plenty. Nonfiction is a different horse, however.
So here it goes.
My 10 rules for writing non-fiction:
Rule #1: Dehumanize and fast. You're no longer a person; you are nothing but a writer.
Remember that glamour is a label attached to authors by people who don't write. Kamikaze
is more fitting.
Rule #2: You only have two readers and their names are Heads and Tails. If you do your job
right you will not please both of them 100%. If you do your job right you WILL leave both of
them happy with your work.
Rule #3: If you do your job right, Heads and Tails might be generally happy but they will also
be pissed off. But YOU hold the coin.
Rule #4: Objectivity: Undistorted by emotion or personal bias. Heads and Tails will hate it but
it maintains the value of the coin which is YOUR work.
Rule #5: There is no such thing as bad publicity - MYTH! The worst thing in the world you
could achieve is a review PROVING you didn't get your facts straight or you didn't refer to
credible sources.
Rule #6: Be partisan all you want in politics, but in nonfiction you're Independent. "He
said/She said" is kindling; the fire is the truth.
Rule #7: (In my opinion) this is the most important one. RESPECT Heads and Tails equally.
They've developed their own opinions which are rightfully theirs. You might not agree a little
or a lot, but they are not a cartoon. They are people.
Rule #8: When you have to humanize to relieve all the stress from being nonhuman, make
sure you have a solid support system. This is real life and real carnage; choose dependable
people, not someone whose drama is 1,000 on the Richter Scale. If there are drama
queens/kings in your life whom you love, take a respectful leave of absence until your book is
finished. Then you can be all ears. Does that sound selfish? Yes because it is. Nature of the
writing beast.
Rule #9: Media. Use them; do not let them use you. Point out misprints and false allegations
the moment you spot them. I once spent four hours combined on the phone with the NWI
Times, the Associated Press and the Indy Star because I was quoted as being a serial
killer's "distant" relative. Believe you me it was worth it. That rumor was killed pretty fast and
in legal terms it could have killed my book. In a lot of states relatives can't profit from another
relative's crimes.
Rule #10: Last but not least, have fun. If that sounds impossible after the first nine rules then
suck up the fact that you're better off in another field. It really can be fun.
So, Ms. You-know-who-you-are, I hope this helped. And to anyone else deciding to drop-kick
their lives into nonfiction I hope I have been of some assistance.
Good day to all.
Dory
